Keeping A Positive Frame of Mind

During the past few months I have been asked by several people how they can to keep a more positive mind set even during these difficulty times. Much of what we hear in the media is negative.

We each have specific things that set us off in any given direction of thought and emotion. The main point is understanding what this is for ourselves.

There are some things that are more difficult to rise above or that may take longer to move on from such as loosing a loved one or being made redundant when we are the main or only bread winner for our family. In the case of loosing a loved one, only time can make this less painful. With loosing a job, however, it may be all about what we choose to focus our minds on, on a regular basis.

If considering what you think about or actually keeping track of what you think about is something you have not seriously considered before, it can be hard, at the beginning to change your patterns of thinking, but this is not impossible. And being in a stressful situation will certainly not make this easy to do.

This is not to be confused with wishful thinking or being unrealistic or not facing the truth about your situation. This is not what I am talking about. What I am talking about is working with your own thoughts to strengthen your own abilities to deal with you are going through.

Taking control of your thoughts can have a huge impact on your emotional state; how happy you feel or make a difference to how quickly you overcome what you are going through. It can affect how easily you make positive progress moving from where you are now, on to where you want to be. All of this can be influenced by what you are thinking about. It can also help you with feeling and being in control.

The first step is making an effort to realise when you are focusing too much on negative thoughts and each time you realise this, change what you are thinking about to thinking about something more positive and productive.

An example of changing thought patterns from negative, destructive thoughts to more positive thoughts would be if someone has been made redundant. In this situation it is clear that one will be worried (and rightly so) about how you are going to pay your bills, feed your family and maintain your home. You are not being asked not to be worried about this. However, when being worried stops you from taking positive steps to change things, this is a problem.

When you find yourself worrying, you can take this energy and re-channel it into doing something to improve things, such as applying for new jobs, reminding yourself of those things in your life that are good i.e. your loved ones, family and friends or doing some retraining to improve your employability.

One of the things I ask clients to do is to right a list of those things that they are grateful for in their lives; those things that are good; those things that make you happy and feel good. When you realise that you are worrying too much, start to focus on this list and change what you are thinking about.

It is a known fact that one cannot be fearful (have worrying thoughts) and be grateful at the same time. So when we refocus our thoughts on those things we are grateful and thankful for, this actually can help us, change our emotional state and give us a better reason to live. It can also be a useful way to begin to come up with more creative ways of dealing with your current situation and moving forward.

Practice makes perfect, as with all things, so the more we work at this the better. One of my personal treats is looking at pictures of my family and times when we have been on holiday and having a great time. I also remind myself of those things that I enjoy doing or that I am good at doing.

Failing this, I take myself for a walk - some mild or strenuous exercise can also improve your mood and your thoughts.

There are many ways to work on keeping a positive frame of mind. We all need to find ways that works for us as individuals. Hope this helps and that you find a way that works for you.